Library Jokes & Puns: Top 100 Rib-Ticklers for Book Lovers

Who says libraries are just for reading and whispering? Get ready to bust your gut with laughter as you check out our list of 100 Funny Library Jokes!

If you’re a librarian, a bookworm, or just someone looking for a good chuckle, you’ve come to the right page. Trust us; these jokes are shelf-aware!

Best Library Jokes

Best Librarian Jokes to Brighten Your Day

Brace yourselves, book lovers! You’re about to crack more than just book spines; you’ll be cracking up with these hilarious library jokes!

  1. Why did the library book file a complaint?
    • It was always getting checked out!
  2. What did one library book say to the other?
    • “You crack me up!”
  3. Why did the computer apply for a job at the library?
    • It wanted to get better at “searching.”
  4. How do librarians flirt?
    • They send “bookmarks.”
  5. Why was the math book sad?
    • It had too many problems.
  6. How do you know if a librarian is an extrovert?
    • They look at your shoes while talking to you.
  7. Why did the librarian get kicked off the plane?
    • She brought too many “carry-on” books!
  8. What’s a library’s favorite snack?
    • “Book”-ies.
  9. How do you catch a squirrel in a library?
    • Climb a tree and act like a “nut.”
  10. What do you call a library that only serves the 1%?
    • “The Elite-erature Club.”
  11. Why did the library go to therapy?
    • It had too many “issues.”
  12. What’s a ghost’s favorite section in the library?
    • Boo-ology.
  13. How do you organize a library space party?
    • You “planet.”
  14. What’s a librarian’s least favorite dance move?
    • The “Overdue-tsy.”
  15. Why did the librarian bring a ladder to work?
    • To reach the high “brow” literature.
  16. What did the librarian say when they found a torn book?
    • “This is tear-able!”
  17. What did the librarian name her daughter?
    • Paige.
  18. What’s a librarian’s favorite type of punctuation?
    • A “comma-n” sense.
  19. What’s the quietest animal in the library?
    • A bookworm.
  20. How does a penguin use the library?
    • It uses its “webbed” feet to surf the internet.
  21. What’s a book’s favorite exercise?
    • Yoga, because it improves its “flexi-bility.”
  22. Why don’t libraries have tennis courts?
    • Too much “racket.”
  23. What did the detective novel say to the romance novel?
    • “I think I’m falling for you. It’s no mystery.”
  24. What did the geography book say to the history book?
    • “You’re all about the past, and I’m all about the world!”
  25. Why did the library get kicked out of school?
    • It was always “talking” during class.
  26. What do you call someone who steals library books?
    • A “bookaneer.”
  27. What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?
    • Bookworms!
  28. Why did the book join the school band?
    • It wanted to play the “readed” instruments.
  29. Why don’t library books get lost?
    • Because they always find their way back to the “shelves.”
  30. How do you know when a librarian is lying?
    • Other librarians “check them out” for accuracy.

So there you have it, folks! Thirty top-shelf library jokes to make you laugh till you’re overdue. Stay tuned for 70 more—coming to a library (or screen) near you!

Library Puns

Hilarious Library Puns to Check Out

Hold on to your bookmarks, people! We’re diving into the whimsical world of library puns that will have you grinning from ear to “dog-eared” page!

  1. Libraries: Where “shhh” happens!
  2. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  3. This library is a real “novelty!”
  4. A library is a “site for sore eyes.”
  5. Don’t judge a book by its movie adaptation.
  6. I “dewey” believe it’s time for another library visit.
  7. “Unshelved” laughter is the best medicine.
  8. That librarian really knows how to “catalogue” my interest!
  9. Feeling “booked” this weekend.
  10. Quiet please, we’re in the “non-shushing” section!
  11. Overdue books—librarians’ “pet “peeves.”
  12. “Check it out,” said the librarian, pun intended.
  13. I’m quite “attached” to eBooks. They “sync” with me.
  14. “Fiction” you say? I can hardly “believe” it!
  15. This library is so cool, it’s absolutely “lit.”
  16. I like big “books” and I cannot lie.
  17. Librarians are “booked” for life.
  18. Quiet, please! The books are “resting.”
  19. They tried to throw the book at me, but I had “overdue” process.
  20. “Read” you loud and clear.
  21. Stacks on stacks of “fun-page-turners.”
  22. Librarians have the “write” stuff.
  23. “Biography” or not “biography,” that is the question.
  24. Don’t worry, be “appy”—use the library app!
  25. Libraries: Where the WiFi connects automatically, and so do people.
  26. “Prose” and cons of library life.
  27. It’s not “hoarding” if it’s books.
  28. “Chapter” and verse, I love this place.
  29. You’re “overdue” for some puns.
  30. “Reading” between the lines of humor.
  31. “Book ’em, Danno!”
  32. The library is a place of “volume.”
  33. Librarians: Guardians of the “Gal-Read-xy.”
  34. Borrowing a book? That’s a “fine” idea.
  35. Libraries give us “papernoon” delight.
  36. I’d tell you a library joke, but it’s “inside” cover.
  37. Libraries: Where everyone gets the “final word.”
  38. These puns are really “drawing” me in, said the graphic novel.
  39. This library joke is “overdue,” but here it is anyway.
  40. “Index” this under “awesome puns.”

There you go, 40 library puns that might just have you “checking out” more than just books! Whether you read ’em or say ’em, these puns are all “cataloged” under H for Hilarious!

Library One Liners

Quick-Wit Library One-Liners

Ready for a rapid-fire round? Here come 40 library one-liners that are quicker than a librarian’s “shhh!”

  1. The library is my “sanctu-read.”
  2. Libraries: Where minds and volumes expand.
  3. In a library, you’re always “booked.”
  4. Libraries: Where “shh” gets real.
  5. Libraries: Free WiFi, priceless knowledge.
  6. The library’s the one place where you can’t “judge a book by its cover.”
  7. I’m booked today; I’m at the library.
  8. Libraries: Never “overdue” for a visit.
  9. Librarians are full of “citations.”
  10. A library: The original search engine.
  11. “Shelf” control is hard here.
  12. “Booked” for the day.
  13. Libraries: The “silence” is golden.
  14. In a library, every book is a “cover” story.
  15. I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you!”
  16. Libraries: The original “book clubs.”
  17. Libraries: Where your imagination has no “late fees.”
  18. Libraries: The best place to “read between the lines.”
  19. Overdue books: The real “criminal records.”
  20. Libraries: Where your story begins.
  21. “Prose” before bros.
  22. Libraries: Where you can get “lost” and “found.”
  23. The “book stops here.”
  24. Libraries: “Quiet” on the outside, loud on the inside.
  25. Libraries: Where every “book” has a “binding” contract.
  26. A library is a hospital for the mind.
  27. Don’t “spine” on me!
  28. Libraries: The ultimate “volume” dealers.
  29. A “novel” idea indeed!
  30. Libraries: Where you’re “read” all over.
  31. Overdue books: Librarians’ “pet peeves.”
  32. Libraries: The one place you’re encouraged to “get lost.”
  33. I told my librarian I’m into “speed reading.” She told me to slow down.
  34. Libraries: Where the story never ends.
  35. Libraries: Don’t “quiet” me now!
  36. Libraries: Where the past, present, and future coexist.
  37. Libraries: They’ve got “classics.”
  38. Libraries: Always a “chapter” ahead.
  39. Libraries: Open books, open minds.
  40. I’d spend all day in the library, but I’ve got “fine” things to do.

Final Thoughts on Our Library Humor Collection

Well, there you have it: A rollicking collection of library jokes, puns, and one-liners that are “overdue” for sharing! Share this article with all the book lovers and librarians you know; they’re sure to find it a “novel” experience. Remember, laughter is “volumeless,” and so is the joy of reading.

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