90 Funny Cat Jokes

Get ready to purr with delight and laugh till your whiskers tremble! We have gathered the purr-fect compilation of 90 funny cat jokes guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.

Whether you’re a cat lover or not, these feline funnies will have you clawing for more, making even the grumpiest tom-cat chuckle.

Table of Contents

Best Cat Jokes

Ready for a mew-sical journey full of laughter? Strap in because we’re about to dive into the funniest collection of CAT jokes that will make you giggle and say, “You’ve gotta be kitten me!”

Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple!
How do you know a cat is agitated? It’s having a hissy fit!
Why was the cat sitting on the computer? He wanted to keep an eye on the mouse!
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain!
Why do cats always get their way? They are very purr-suasive!
Why was the cat afraid of the tree? Because of its bark!
How does a cat shop? She uses a cat-alog!
Why did the cat run from the tree? Because it was afraid of the bark!
What do cats like to eat on a hot day? A mice-cream cone!
Why did the cat wear a dress? She was feline fine!
Why are cats good at video games? Because they have nine lives!
How does a cat stop a video? By pressing paws!
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic!
What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping!
What do you call a cat that can play guitar? A musical mew-sician!
What’s a cat’s way of keeping law & order? Claw Enforcement!
What do you call a cat who can bowl? An alley cat!
What do you call a cat that can put together furniture? An assembly kit-ten!
Why don’t cats like online shopping? They prefer a cat-alog.
Why is it hard to argue with a cat? They always whisker you away with their points.
What do you call a cat who loves to jog? A purrennial runner!
What do you call a cat who broke the law? A purr-petrator!
How do you know when a cat is done washing? When it’s fur is all licked!
Why do cats make good detectives? Because they always paws to consider all the evidence!
How do you know a cat has been on your computer? You see pawswords all over the screen!
How do cats stop crimes? They call claw enforcement!
Why are cats such good tennis players? Because they have the perfect serve – they always land on their feet!
What do you call a cat that throws all the most expensive parties? The Great Catsby!
What do you call a cat that can bark? A mew-tant!

And there you have it! Our first 30 CAT-tastic jokes to make you roar with laughter. Trust me, we’re not kitten around here!

Cat Puns

Hold on to your tails! We’re about to embark on a pun-derful journey that’s guaranteed to bring a smile on your face. Brace yourself for a cascade of cat puns that’ll leave you ‘feline’ good!

Don’t stress meow-t!
You’ve got to be kitten me.
Stop kitten around.
You’re the cat’s meow!
Not a furry good idea.
Stay pawsitive.
This is simply purr-fect.
Don’t rush me, I’m paw-ndering.
Just a game of cat and mouse.
Stop beating around the bush, I’m not kitten.
Cat got your tongue?
Just living a pawsome life.
She’s a real glamour-puss.
My cat is quite the paw-jama!
It’s just a little scratch, no need to make a whole hiss-teria about it.
You’re looking very purr-suasive today.
Time spent with cats is never wasted. It’s purr-iceless!
Stop pro-cat-stinating!
I’m not fat, I’m just fluffy! It’s all fur show.
Just because I’m a cat, doesn’t mean I can’t have a paw-some career.
That’s enough! I’ve had it up to here with your caterwauling.
You’ve got to be fur-real right now.
I’m not lion to you.
This is just claw-ful!
He’s the cat’s whiskers.
Claw and order are important.
That’s a catastic idea!
Cats are not mean, they’re just brutally lionest.
Don’t mind him, he’s just having a little mouse-trophe.
It’s not a cat nap, it’s beauty sleep!

And there you have it, folks! Our collection of puns that are more than just a ‘little scratch’ on the surface. We hope they’ve left you ‘feline’ fine!

Cat One Liners

Prepare to be thrilled with our CAT-astrophic one-liners! These sharp, witty sentences will have you laughing faster than a cat chasing a laser pointer!

Cats are like potato chips, you can’t just have one!
The cat is truly the best alarm clock.
Cats never strike a pose that isn’t photogenic.
You haven’t been ignored until you’ve been ignored by a cat.
One cat just leads to another.
Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat.
My cat isn’t spoiled, I’m just well trained.
Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.
If cats could talk, they wouldn’t.
Cats know how to obtain food without labor, shelter without confinement, and love without penalties.
The ideal of calm exists in a sitting cat.
No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
Cats rule the world.
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.
A cat is a lion in a jungle of small bushes.
Cats have it all – admiration, endless sleep, and company only when they want it.
The smallest feline is a masterpiece.
A purring cat is a form of high praise.
There are two means of refuge from the misery of life — music and cats.
Cats can work out mathematically the exact place to sit that will cause the most inconvenience.
Cats choose us; we don’t own them.
Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.
A meow massages the heart.
Time spent with a cat is never wasted.
Life is better with cats.
I believe cats to be spirits come to earth.
I love cats more than I love most people.
There are few things in life more heartwarming than being welcomed by a cat.
In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.
Cats, as anyone who has ever been around them for any length of time well knows, are inscrutable.

Final thoughts

And that, dear readers, wraps up our delightful journey through cat humor, puns, and one-liners. We hope it’s brought a smile to your face and that you’re feline good about sharing these laughs with friends, family, and, of course, your favorite furry companions. Always remember, life is simply better with a little cat-titude!