Funny Whale Jokes for Kids: 100 Laughs Under the Sea

Hello, ocean-lovers and laughter-seekers! Have you ever listen a joke from a whale?  Well, buckle up, because we are about to dive deep into the sea of humor with a splash of wittiness.

Welcome to the gigantic, hilarious world of “101 Funny Whale Jokes”

Whale Puns: Giggle with the Giants of the Ocean

Dive in! Let’s start our journey with some puns that are larger than life, just like our whale friends. Get ready to blow your tops, because here are 45 whale puns that’ll make your day a ‘whale’ lot better!

1. What do whales eat for dinner? – ‘Krill’ed Cheese.
2. Why don’t whales use Facebook? – Because they don’t like to click-bait.
3. What do you call a whale with a crown? – The Prince of ‘Whales’.
4. Why was the whale so unhappy? – Because he felt a bit ‘blubber’.
5. Why did the whale cross the road? – To get to the other ‘tide’.
6. What do you call a baby whale that never comes on time? – A ‘whaley’ late.
7. How did the whale get to the disco? – It went by ‘krill’er ride.
8. How do whales make a decision? – They ‘flipper’ coin.
9. Why did the whale get a promotion? – It was a ‘sea’ soned professional.
10. What is a whale’s favorite play? – Romeo and ‘Gill’iet.
11. What’s a whale’s favorite candy? – ‘Krill’y Ranchers.
12. What’s a whale’s favorite TV show? – ‘Whale’ of Fortune.
13. How do whales talk to each other? – They use ‘shell’ phones.
14. Why do whales love music? – Because it’s ‘orca’stra.
15. What kind of whale can fly? – A ‘pilot’ whale.
16. Why don’t whales ever feel lost? – Because they always ‘whale’come home.
17. What’s a whale’s favorite song? – “I ‘krill’ always love you”.
18. How do whales stay healthy? – They always have a ‘porpoise’ in life.
19. What’s a whale’s favorite kind of humor? – ‘Dry’ jokes.
20. Why don’t whales ever feel alone? – They always have a ‘pod’ by their side.
21. How do whales greet each other? – “‘Whale’ hello there!”
22. What do you call a noisy whale? – A ‘blubber’ mouth.
23. What do you call a fashionable whale? – ‘Tide’ and trendy.
24. What’s a whale’s favorite type of joke? – ‘Tide’ly funny puns.
25. What do whales love about the ocean? – The ‘tide’ bits of fun.
26. Why was the whale at the party? – It was ‘krilling’ it on the dance floor.
27. What do whales read in the morning? – The ‘Daily ‘Krill’ news.
28. How does a whale ask for forgiveness? – It ‘blubbers’ an apology.
29. What do whales say when they’re surprised? – “Whale, I’ll be!”
30. Why did the whale become a baker? – Because it loved ‘krill’er pastries.
31. What’s a whale’s favorite holiday? – Christmas, for the ‘porpoise’ of giving.
32. How do whales handle bad news? – They take it with a grain of ‘salt’.
33. What do whales call it when they mess up? – A ‘blunder the sea’.
34. What do you call a whale that’s always positive? – An ‘opti-mystic’.
35. How do whales stay cool in summer? – They have ‘whale’ made fans.
36. What do whales love about nights? – The ‘starfish’ in the sky.
37. How does a whale say goodbye? – “Whale meet again”.
38. What do you call a whale magician? – A ‘hocus-porpoise’.
39. Why was the whale feeling blue? – It had the deep sea ‘blues’.
40. What’s a whale’s favorite story? – ‘Moby-Dick’.
41. What’s a whale’s favorite movie? – ‘The Whale of Wall Street’.
42. What do you call a whale who can’t make up its mind? – A ‘maybe’-lena.
43. How does a whale apologize? – It ‘whales’ sorry.
44. What’s a whale’s favorite drink? – ‘Squid’ ink.
45. Why do whales love sports? – For the ‘halibut’.

Whale One-Liners: Quick Jokes for Speedy Giggles

Hold your breath and keep your flippers crossed! Here comes a tidal wave of 45 whale one-liners that are bound to make a splash!

1. I told my friend I saw a whale. He said, “In the sea?” I said, “No, in the way!”
2. Whale you be my friend?
3. I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s 7 years in a row now.
4. Want to hear a whale of a tale?
5. I’ve got a whale of a problem, it’s just too big!
6. Whale, whale, whale, what do we have here?
7. If at first you don’t succeed, then maybe you should do it the way I told you to in the beginning.
8. I used to go fishing with a whale. He was quite the catch.
9. Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything.
10. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
11. Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
12. I didn’t fall, I’m just spending some quality time with the floor.
13. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
14. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
15. Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul to Santa.
16. Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
17. I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
18. Whales don’t sing because they have an answer, they sing because they have a song.
19. I dream of a better tomorrow… where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned.
20. There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.
21. I’m not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone.
22. Whale hello there!
23. The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
24. If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
25. Whale, that’s a different kettle of fish!
26. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted paychecks.
27. If I wanted to kill myself I’d climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
28. We live in an era where pizzas show up faster than the police.
29. The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
30. If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents.
31. I don’t exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it.
32. Whale, I’ll be!
33. If you don’t like my driving, then get off the sidewalk.
34. I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
35. My psychiatrist told me I was crazy. I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
36. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
37. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
38. You can’t be late until you show up.
39. Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up.
40. Dolphins – the clowns of the sea. Whales – the opera singers of the ocean.
41. Whale you be mine?
42. Whale that was unexpected.
43. I’m on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
44. It’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you place the blame.
45. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

Best Whale Jokes: Hilarious Tales from the Deep

Ready to dive deeper? Grab your snorkels, because we’re diving into 21 of the best whale jokes that’ll have you laughing till you breach!

1. Why was the baby whale upset? Because it wasn’t getting its blubber’s milk.
2. What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, it just waved. But the whale waved back!
3. Why did the whale wear glasses? To improve its humpback vision.
4. What do whales listen to on their headphones? Pod-casts!
5. Why did the whale blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
6. How does a pod of whales make a decision? They have a whale of a debate.
7. What do you call a whale with no teeth? A gummy whale!
8. How do you know when a whale likes you? It gives you a whale of a time.
9. Why do whales love practical jokes? They enjoy a good squid prank.
10. What is a whale’s favorite kind of sandwich? Krill cheese!
11. What do you call a whale who likes to shake things up? A quaker whale!
12. Why did the whale start going to the gym? It wanted to be a muscled dolphin!
13. How do whales stick to their diet? They don’t krill their appetite.
14. Why did the whale become a movie star? It had the right ‘porpoise’ in life.
15. Why don’t whales use GPS? They prefer the ‘navi-gator’.
16. What did the whale say after a good meal? That was ‘krill’er!
17. How does a whale propose? It gets down on one ‘knee’d!
18. How do whales like to relax? By watching their favorite ‘stream’!
19. What do you call a whale that never stops talking? A ‘blabber’-mouth!
20. How do whales celebrate birthdays? With a ‘sea’-prise party!
21. Why do whales become comedians? They love the ‘puns’ and games.

Last Words: Funny Jokes About Whales to End on a High Note

We have navigated the ocean of humor and discovered the hidden treasures of whale puns, jokes, and one-liners. May your days be filled with the mirth and playfulness of these lovable sea giants, and may every joke bring a ‘whale’ of a time to your day